9 Ways to be Happy

Remember getting something you really wanted after:

1. Hankering after it.
2. Sleeping with the necessary people.
3. Kissing numerous asses. 
4. Working your butt off for it.

Those were the good days, eh? But that wasn't my point. Remember feeling empty and thinking "This is it? I'll just jump around a little so that nobody around will see that I'm miserable."?

So I chalked up a list (I love lists! A friend compares my lists to bottomless pits. Maybe because they're cylindrical?) of things that make me happy:

1. Lists.
2. Horses.
3. Bumping into a school/ college friend.
4. Delicious clothes.
5. Delicious food.
6. Making delicious food
7. Reading a good book.

It goes on and on. If you want the whole list, gimme your email id and I'll send it to you.

So, steps to be happy:

No rabies. Yay!

1. Accept the truth that nobody's happy all the time. You may be happy for a second when you eat that ice cream, but brain freeze! Moral: Don't eat ice cream in one second.
2. Live in slow motion. Eat slowly, love slowly, and savor the good stuff. Slowly. Exception: when a zombie is after you. Run!
3. Be wrapped up in your own world. Don't let tongues wagging affect you. Exception: If the tongue belongs to a rabid dog. Run!
4. Make a List-of-Things-That-Will-Cheer-Me-Up. If you don't like making lists, get a close friend to make it for you.  If you don't have a close friend, nothing to worry about! (uh oh. Reminds me of this) I'm (almost) always there for you. 
5. Get off your butt and do something physical. Or maybe twiddle your toes now and then. Who doesn't like toned toes? Especially people with a foot fetish, if that's the crowd you want to attract.
6. Be kind to yourself. Forgive yourself for the silly mistakes you've made, inappropriate things you've said or the bloopers you've made. 
7. Don't compare yourself to others. You have your stuff and others have theirs. So if you look like a fish with human attributes on a Facebook photo you were tagged in, don't fret. (Hopefully) others will have fish days too.Unless you're better than others. In that case, gloat and be happy. 
8. Oh, and point 7 reminds me of Facebook envy. Everyone posts their best moments, best pictures and best everything. So try to share in their happiness or don't use Facebook at all.
9. Be kind to others too. Or don't be an asshole. Whichever works.

Peace and Joy!